Assumed Disability
Dear Mark,
I have a 15 year old daughter who is extremely angry ! I don't know what to do for her. I question every action I take. She is loved. She needs to know she is loved and I don't know what to do for her. In second grade she was labeled ADHD with a learning disability. I took her out of public school and we began to homeschool. She did not read until age 12. She always has been strong willed even as an infant. I want peace in our home. I want peace for her and between the two of us. Your advice would be most welcome.
In Christ,
Dear Parent:
You should look at the chart on our web under charts: Goals of Misbehavior. I believe you will find the root cause of your daughter's anger. Take note of the last section on Assumed Disabilities. Also, there is a book that you must read titled, The Education of a Child by Fenelon.
If you follow the principles in this book, I believe that you will find the peace that you are searching for, for both you and your daughter. You can find this book on our web or be calling us. Let me know your thoughts after you read the chart and then let's dialogue again once you have read the book. Gaining understanding is the first step to helping you. Never forget, God has designed you daughter and her needs, and equipped you and your husband to be able to meet those needs. You have been granted by God to be the chosen vessel to help supply the needs of your daughter's heart.
Once your daughter sees that her parents fulfilling this vital role in her life, she then will more easily be able to see her need for her heavenly Father. Only He can meet the deepest needs of her heart. You should also read Lamentations chapter 3, in several different English versions. This will help.
Mark Hamby
Other helpful recommendations:
War of Words by Welch, When People are Big and God is Small; Heartfelt Discipline, and lastly, Let Go by Fenelon. But most important is The Education of a Child by Fenelon.
Lynn: our email counseling ministry is designed to help others who may be facing similar conflicts. Your is a new and will be very helpful to others.
We delete all names to protect. With your permission, can we post your email. I believe that our dialogue together will be a benefit to others.
Let me know. Vulnerability is the first step.
