Resistant Child
Mark,
I am so grateful for your response. I know all the changing has to come from me. All day long I tell God that I don't know what to do and He is helping me, very slowly. I still spank, but much less. I've never been out of control as a parent, but I hate the drill sergeant thing that has been going on. I want so much for my family, and I can see where we are headed if I do not change. Growing Kids Gods Way was a bad start for me, looking back. I so wanted to be a good Christian parent, recognizing that I needed help due to a lack of training. I guess all of these books, one at a time, have brought me closer to what God wants. I can look back and see where He has been bringing me. Grace based parenting, by far, is the hardest of all concepts to grasp and implement. I guess if God had shown me that first, I would have laughed!
I will order the books you have suggested now and begin reading them one at a time. Thank you so much for the suggestions. Thank you also for your story. Your honesty has helped many, I am sure.
Please share my story, I also believe that my sins and troubles can be used to help others and I am never ashamed to do so.
Dear Parent :
One more thought that might help. Always remember the way that God brought you to Himself—by His grace and mercy. His lavish love and forgiveness is what brought you to Himself. Remember it is the goodness of God that leads to repentance. The wrath of man works not the righteousness of God. These truths will help guide your thoughts.
Grace to you,
Mark
Mark,
I thank you for your help and reply. It is funny, but the letter about Grace that you referred me to was the letter I first read that broke me and my heart. She described my youngest and the way in which we were going. I was so grateful to hear of someone with a similar situation that found help from God through grace. I am still struggling so much though.
So we are finally back and of course the reality of life has hit, namely asking children to do what is expected of them in a graceful manner. I am still so dumbfounded, even with the little successes that we have had, as to how to really go about changing who I am and having kids that are happy, love the Lord, and behave. I am continuing to read and pray. I just need so much help in this area and it is almost overwhelming, but I know God will help me. I also know Satan doesn't want us to succeed, and I see where he works. We listened to your tapes on the way over and the way back and my husband enjoyed them also.
I don't think you can offer me anymore help other than to keep directing me to the One who can help me. I don't want to keep bothering you, I just have to stay in for the long haul, continuing to strive for what I know I must do and be. I look forward to meeting you in Vero with my husband. Please pray for us.
thank you for everything,
Dear Parent:
As you ask God to help you, you will find that He will bring just the right book, person, or circumstance in your life at just the right time. The little book, Let Go by Fenelon will be a real help to you. It is one of my favorites that has helped me through the years.
Yesterday I was talking to Lew Sterritt of Sermon on the Mount Ministries and he shared with me that God grows us up by bringing offenses into our lives. The only way to make us more forgiving, is to allow us to be offended more. Kind of twisted, but it does seem to be God's program.
His grace is sufficient and His strength is made perfect in our weakness (not our strength).
Mark
Ps. Don't strive to have happy children, strive to be happy in Christ. This will influence them more!
