This is Working!
Mark,
I wanted to run something past you to get your feedback on it. I have a book by Doorposts called For Instructions in Righteousness. It is a topical reference guide for biblical child-training. Are you familiar with it? It is organized by different sins that we could all commit such as Sins of a Proud Heart, Sins of Discontent, Sins of Unbelief, etc. The way I am using it is this: When there is a problem in the family like this morning, I decide which area might need working on. This morning both boys were doing mean things to each other. When I asked why they were doing these things to each other, they both used the other as their excuse. I used the section under pride called Shifting blame/making excuses. It has a section for the scriptures for the sin itself, a section for what happens if this sin continues, what this sin is likened to, stories that illustrate the consequences of this sin, and the blessings of the opposite character trait.
Do you think (I have finally gotten to my question) that this is an appropriate way, if handled lovingly, to discuss scripture with my kids when they have sinned against each other and God? I see that after a time, the Word changes their angry hearts into understanding hearts. I wanted to know what you thought of it.
Dear Persevering Mom
:
That is wonderful. A gracefull approach always works, but beware…the enemy will not take this sort of victory sitting down. Just make sure you follow the path of humility, gentleness, many acts of repentance, and forgiveness.
Concerning your question. I think that if it is working and the children aren't rebelling against it, then it sounds fine. Be careful that it doesn't turn into a formal discipline method. Then you will only be shifting your olds habits into a new method that fits your agenda. In Fenelon's book, The Education of a Child, he emphasizes repeatedly, that we must embrace teachable moments, not strict laborious lessons. So even for this apparent godsend of a book, use it sparingly. Ask God to give you creative opportunities as well. And above all, teach as much as possible when the children are doing well, not just when they are having problems.
Please keep in touch. The books you are reading will truly be a blessing. You may also benefit from reading some of the parenting counseling sessions on our website. There is one in particular that you should read, titled, Does Grace Really Work, that I think you will enjoy.
Sincerely,
Mark Hamby
